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Mild Curses

!mildcurses@piefed.social

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Mild Curse: Every time you refresh the tracking number page, it delays the shipment by one additional hour.

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Whenever you make a mistake, you compulsively say "Uh-oh spaghettios!" in a slightly louder-than-indoor voice.

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Mild Curse: you can feel something in your shoe, but when you check, it's never there.

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Based on a true story.

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Mild curse: no matter how meticulously you put on your socks, they're twisted weird

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And you can feel it

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Mild Curse: No matter how hungry you are, or how badly you were craving something, the moment it is set down in front of you, you no longer want it.

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Mild Curse: Every time you crescendo while making love, you yell "Hey, Macarena!"

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Nothing perforated ever rips properly for you

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Toilet paper, paper towels, cardboard boxes, cheques, they’re all a hot mess.

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Mild Curse: Every time you go to watch a movie in the theatre, the trailer for the same movie plays right before the screening

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Totally not inspired by the time this happened to me with Sinners

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Mild Curse: Whenever you trim your nails, they instantly grow to the point that it's annoying, but not enough that it's worth trimming again immediately

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💅

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Mild Curse: Randomly, some things you set on flat surfaces fall off as if they aren't level even when they are

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Mild Curse: Every time you need to go on a toilet someone else is just finishing so you have to wait

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Mild Curse: Everytime you pick your nose someone notices

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Mild Curse: anytime you need to end a call you do the "No, you hang up first" thing.

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You’ll always be the one who was to hang up, and you will feel bad about it, and this situation will happen regardless of what the call is, unless it’s automated.

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Mild curse: every time you start a meal, you compulsively say, "Let's go to Flavortown"

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Mild Curse: Once a day you forget how to swallow for a minute when you attempt to eat or drink.

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Ugh, what muscles do I use to get this stuff down my throat again?

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Mild curse: Everytime you pay with cash, your the change from the cashier is an huge amount of low valued coins.

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It is so hard to spend that kind of change.

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Mild curse: Every time you leave the house you remember you forgot something kind of important, at exactly the distance away where it is impossible to decide whether it's worth going back to get it

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Mild Curse: One's long time ringtone finds it's way into ads played everywhere around oneself

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Mild Curse: Your hair looks…fine.

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Mild Curse: First drop of rain on one's smartphone's screen always registers as a finger

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